The Banshees of Inisherin

 Spoilers

This movie stars Colin Farrel, who plays Padraic, and Brendan Glee, who plays Colm, as two life-long friends, who live on the small island of Inisherin. Colm decides one day that he no longer wants to be friends with Padraic because he no longer finds him interesting. He desires instead to spend the rest of his days writing a song for which he will be remembered with his violin. This turn of events has a tragic effect on both of them. The rejection of his friend turns Padraic slowly from a kind-hearted, gentle man to a cold-hearted, violent man. On the other hand, Colm so desires to communicate his end of their friendship by making a vow that if Padraic will not leave him alone, he will cut off his fingers. This leaves him mutilated by the end of the movie (ironically so, since he can no longer play the violin with his fingers). As a result, one of the fingers, thrown at Padraic's house, chokes Padraic's beloved donkey, causing Padraic to seek revenge by burning down Colm's house (even hoping that Colm would be inside). 

The movie has many layers to it but one of the main points is to show that relationships form us, or deform us, in ways we don't realize until we lose them. The loss of these relationships is the loss of a part of ourselves, as our friends influence who we are and who we are not in many ways. Both men become less human in a way, Padraic in his loss of his kindness and Colm as a literal example of the deformation that takes place when we fail to invest ourselves in the lives of others and to be invested in by others. 

Although the movie is primarily about the necessity of friendship in maintaining our humanity, I want to apply it today to the friendships God has commanded us to have with one another as the church. 

I have been in ministry since I was 18 years old. I have been a variety of churches and witnessed a lot of people come in and out but the one constant I have witnessed is that those who invest in the friendship of the church (of both elders and the laity), regardless of how deformed they may have been before, begin to take upon themselves a human formation but those who do not really invest themselves to befriend both the elders and the laity either remain malformed or become so over time.

God has so made it that we will not be conformed to the image of the Son, true humanity, apart from our friendships with one another. Although many know how to make friends with some of the laity, some laity are left out and it is perhaps some of these people that may hold the key to one's own completion. Even if this is not the case, we might hold the key to theirs and are so commanded to love them by seeking friendship with them. 

However, one of the most impactful friendships I believe a Christian will ever have will be with his elders. This type of friendship is really most formative as a mentorship. Hence, God commands the church to obey their leaders as mentors. The elder functions as a father over a household. Imagine trying to be formed into an adult as a child without reference to a father. 

We know that the lack of a father severely stunts the maturity of people but so does having a father but not having a good relationship with him. Many attempt to replace their fathers with mothers or siblings but it leads to malformities all the same. I believe this is where most Christians fail to realize that having a right relationship with their elders is not merely a luxury but a necessity for their Christian growth, and they and their families will not survive the neglect of it.

It also destroys the family of God as a whole. When one is malformed his relationship with other Christians deforms them as well. No man is an island. The weeds you plant will not merely stay in your yard. This is why it is so vital that we make and maintain right relationships with elders as fathers and church members as brothers and sisters, noting the deep familial connection that we are to have with one another. The neglect of these relationships is the neglect of our human growth in Christ. We become warped, and much like the characters in the story, don't seem to notice until it is too late and our entire lives are in ruin.

The movie is a sad one. It ends somewhat ambiguous as to whether they will become friends once again but the tragedies that had come as a result of their broken friendship cannot be undone. Let us heed the lesson of this simple parable.